This insomnia bullshit has got to stop. I kind of feel like a god, though, because I don't NEED sleep like the rest of the mortals. Ha ha. In case you can't tell, my sanity tends to leave me as I drift into the early morning hours.
T-minus six hours until I have to be at work. Which means, t-minus six hours to mill over whether or not this actually IS the right thing for me to be doing. That whole store reaks of things that will never be; forgotten dreams and lives of failure... it's one thing for a 17-year-old to be working at Stanley's; hell, it beats McDonald's (sorry Vicki, Mel, and Bryan), but it's quite another for a 42-year-old mother of four to be working there... I, for one, know a dead end when I see one.
I'm bitter and I'm bitchy and I'm quite a bit insane this morning.
My new favorite song is "Overwhelmed" by Everclear. I just keep playing it over and over, a lot like I used to do with "Jumper" by 3EB when I waa 14. I guess I relate to it. Actually, anyone in the world could see that, especially if they've spoken to me in the past five months. I never let up... but then again, I HAVE been known to hold a grudge. Okay, I'm gripping on to this one, refusing to let it go, but I figure that it's my right, after all the shit I got put through. He did fuck me over, after all...
"You say you'll love me forever, then you spit on me." Art Alexakis. (a reoccuring theme in this diary.)