I hate spring. I have terrible allergies.

Example: I just got up to put "Rancid 2000" in my CD player, and as I was walking into the living room, I sneezed, covering my mouth with my hand. As I picked up my CD case, I felt something wet on my hand, and I looked at it and saw a big fucking ball of phlem all over my hand. I goobered onto my own hand.

I'm a sick, sick bastard.