My World Lit teacher yelled at me today. I walked up to her to get the work I missed the past two days and she snapped at me, "And I've got to tell you, I'm getting really fed up with your attendence."

You know what I wanted to say? I wanted to tell her to go fuck herself. I wanted to say that it wasn't her business, that it wasn't affecting her life any, so she she stay out of it. I wanted to ask her if she thought she was the only one in the world to tell me this, if she thought that this was something new.

But you know what I did? I walked away. Just like I always do.

Does she think that I don't know that I'm screwing up my life? Does she think that I don't know what I can be and what I am and the difference between the two? Does she think that I don't realize I could be one of the top kids in my class if I gave two shits about school? I know this. I realized it long ago and I'm sorry that she can't see that.

It's bullshit. It's all bullshit. She shouldn't have said it and I shouldn't have done it. But I think what I'm more mad about was my silence about the whole thing. I just walked away. I'm so tired of walking away and getting stepped on. What happened to the brave Rachel who was so sure of herself? She's gone now. And now I'm working on getting through life one step at a time.

I'm sorry I didn't show up to school. But it happened. And her telling me she didn't like it won't change that. It happened. It's there. And I'm sorry it happened. But all the sorries in the world can't change the fact that it happened.

So, fuck you, Ms. LeBlanc. I don't care about your class and I really don't care about your opinion of me. I do care that you're trying to influence my life, but it didn't work, so I'm not all that worried. I know what I can be. I know who I am. And I like who I am. So fuck you, because you are nothing to me.

Ah. Now that I'm done venting, I'll go.