How come I completely forgot that being in a relationship actually requires work? How come I forgot that it isn't all fun and games, that actual real emotion is involved and that's dangerous ground to be treading on?

I never ended up bringing up all the stuff I was talking about in my last entry to Fatty. I didn't think it was necessary and we ended up having a four hour long discussion about a whole other problem anyway.

But tonight, I could tell something was wrong. And he said that my "attitude is spuradic" and that he thought I was getting tired of him. I tried to explain to him that I'm not tired of him, but I DO want to spend a little time alone every now and then. He said he understood, we talked about some other things and then he says, "Yeah, I think I've got to figure out a way to deal with work and friends and...". And I was relieved. Because I didn't have to bring it up. I was worried that he might think I was getting tired of him if I brought it up, but obviously, he did anyway. And then he brought it up anyway.

But either way, we both agreed that we need to figure out a way to have a happy medium between all the things in our lives. I don't know how that's going to happen, but at least now we both agree that something needs to be done.

I had completely forgotten that to be in a real, adult relationship, you actually have to talk and compromise and be honest and share your feelings (something I'm really just learning how to do) and all these other things that I kind of let go when I was alone. But I think it's starting to come back to me. I think that sooner or later, the whole beginning phase of our relationship will end and he'll realize that I'm here to stay and I'll realize that he's here to stay and we'll stop being obsessed over the fact that we're actually in love and we'll stop being obsessed with each other and then we'll figure out a way to make a real place in each other's lives, without having to sacrifice our normal day-to-day practices.

That time is coming and that's when the real good stuff starts. Anybody can fall in love, but it takes a miracle to make it last.